Princess Leia Is Duped Again

He was hot. Really hot. And despite his hotness factor was still nerdy enough to want to attend the ‘Star Wars In Concert Series Event’…notable. To say the evening was entertaining would be a vast understatement. Never mind that we were being graced by the presence of Anthony Daniels, the man who voiced C-3PO, but more importantly we were besieged by grown men who may or may not have been decked out in full head-to-toe Star Wars costumes...and despite not having the ability to hold down a job, were somehow capable of multi-tasking by logging countless hours in front of the computer playing W.O.W., all while role playing Dungeons and Dragons simultaneously. Pure, enthralling, epic entertainment in its finest form!

Afterwards we went to dinner where instead of sitting across from me he sat beside me, and was engagingly affectionate. Not overly, sickeningly affectionate that makes other people feel awkwardly uncomfortable like when you’re in Sacrament and some sweet spirit…you know the type where she’s worthy enough to be translated but too heavy to get off the ground…is up there bearing her testimony about having received confirmation that she’s supposed to marry the wards most eligible bachelor, but more adorably affectionate where you feel safe and secure all cuddled in his nook. Our dialogue exchange was witty and clever, and I found him to be charismatic and captivating…this was something I could get used to.


He had me home by 1:30 am and as I drifted off to sleep I couldn’t help but grin from ear-to-ear thinking about a seemingly perfect evening.


As I awoke the next morning, my natural instinct was to reach for my phone where I found several texts and emails awaiting my reply, in addition to several Facebook alerts. Well naturally I pulled up my FB app, and there in front of me, on the Home Page for all the world to see, was the notification that Mr. Star Wars VonSchmoozer had changed his relationship status to “In A Relationship” at 12:16 am…with another girl. They have since been married. And divorced. One word: Inevitable. One more word: Karma.

If your date changes his FB relationship status to denote being in a relationship with another girl---while you’re out with him…UNDATABLE!

(And apparently unmarriable.)